Hagar – you are seen
Series: Like you and me | Bible text: Genesis 16
Hagar had to stand in as a slave for Sarah, Abraham’s wife, because she could not have children. When she was pregnant, the two women had a catfight, so Hagar fled into the desert. There she met an angel who told her to humble herself and go back. Hagar called the Lord who had spoken to her El Roi – God who sees me. Because she received kudos from God, she was able to go back into the emotional wreckage.
Have you ever sworn that you would never come back to this place? Maybe to a workplace where you were bullied, or a horrible family where you did shore duty, or a person who hurt you deeply? There are even people who have left their family with the determination never to have contact with these people again. The phrase «the tablecloth is cut» expresses the definite decision.
Bitch alert
In Genesis 16 we meet Hagar, a woman who finds herself in a hopeless situation. Sarai, the wife of the patriarch Abram, does not become pregnant, although God has promised her a child. She waits and waits – and eventually loses patience. She has – as we so often do – a better idea of how God can get to his goal. «Then Sarai said to Abram: «The Lord has not given me children. You sleep with my slave girl. Perhaps I can have children through her.» Abram agreed»(Genesis 16:2 NL). In well-heeled circles it was customary at that time: if a wife was childless, she would send one of her slave girls to her husband’s bed. She then bears a child that belongs to her mistress. Hagar, Sara’s maid, makes herself available. She actually becomes pregnant and thus a surrogate mother for Sarah and Abraham.
Those fascinated by juicy scandals need only reach for the Bible: «Bitch alert in the Abrahams» house!«The headline could read. There is a lot of «humanity» in the patriarch’s tents. Presumably, the slave girl Hagar was brought back from Egypt as booty after Abraham had made an inglorious detour there. She is an outsider. «When Hagar realised she was pregnant, she despised her mistress Sarai»(V4b NL). With her pregnancy, this woman suddenly has a trump card against her mistress, who, it seems, does not like to tolerate threatening competition. Both women are completely overwhelmed with their situation. The sparks are flying! One can well imagine the teasing: Hagar proudly carries her growing belly in front of her and gives Sarai disparaging looks, along the lines of: «I can do what you can’t!»
«Then Sarai reproached Abram: «This is all your fault! Now that my slave girl is pregnant, I am despised by her. Yet I have given her to you as a wife. Let the Lord be judge between you and me!» Abram replied: «She is your slave. Do with her as you see fit.» But when Sarai dealt harshly with her, Hagar ran away.»(V.5+6 NL). Hagar blows the fuse and takes flight. And now the situation becomes critical: she has taken the child with her, the heir who does not belong to her but to Abram and Sarai.
Desert experience
A woman who marches a day’s journey into this desert has no intention of coming back. If Hagar were to come back, the death penalty probably awaited her. Not only did she refuse to work, but she also took the child with her into the abyss. It is over with her. But there is one thing Hagar did not reckon with: that God has his fingers in this bitter conflict. The tenderness with which God meets Hagar is deeply moving. The desperate slave girl almost cannot believe that none other than the God of Abraham pursues her and catches up with her at the lowest point of her life. «The angel of the Lord found Hagar in the desert beside the spring on the way to Shur»(V.7 NL).
Desert times have it all. In desert times, God accomplishes things that he cannot accomplish in the midst of the noise and distractions of our normal daily lives. God loves to meet people who are in the barrenness of a desert. That is why it is so important that we regularly retreat into the desert. By doing so, we give God the opportunity to work on our character.
The angel asks Hagar a simple question on God’s behalf: «Hagar, slave of Sarai, where are you from and where are you going?»(v.8a NL). Isn’t it interesting what kind of questions God sometimes asks? «Where are you, Adam?», «Where is your brother, Cain?», «What do you want me to do for you?», «What are you doing here, Elia?» … God asks questions – not because he information, but because we Need information about us. The first question is answered by Hagar herself: «I am on the run from my mistress Sarai» (v.8b). What is interesting is what is not in this answer. If I were as hurt as she is, I would probably burst with anger at this point: «That stupid cow! If you only knew how she treated me! The ungrateful creature!» No trace of any of this. Only the admission of being on the run. No accusations, no insinuations, no urge to get rid of her side of the story, No victim role. Aren’t we always blaming the others or the circumstances?
God does not pity them either. His second question: «Where are you going?«he answers himself: «Return to your mistress and submit to her»(V.9 NL). Poor Hagar! Back to this emotional shambles, back to impending punishment? Is not Sarai rather the one who should humble herself and apologise? There is no consideration for Hagar’s feelings. She should just do what is due. What God puts Hagar through is not for cowards. How did she cope with it?
Return
The answer is in the name she gives to God: «El Roi – the God who sees me». She looked into God’s eyes. Going back is an imposition if we have not met God first. Those who have received prestige and strength from Him can humble themselves and face unreasonable challenges! El Roi: He saw me – and I saw him! With that, the whole situation changed.
God also invites us to this encounter. A few thousand years after Hagar, this El Roi got a face: Jesus Christ. El Roi, man made for us. Irresistible in his love. Unconditional in his grace. In this story, too, the coming of Jesus Christ casts its shadow ahead. God saw that Hagar’s real problem was not the hostile behaviour of Sarai, but the separation between her and her Creator. The feeling of being uncared for, orphaned, helplessly at the mercy of an arbitrary fate. In the desert, she makes the great discovery that we may also make: There is someone who pays attention to me, whose longing for me is even deeper than my longing for him.
El Roi has seen me, has given me prestige. I can humble myself and look life in the face. Back to the place where I have been hurt or abused, where I have been guilty of others, where I feel overwhelmed. Those who have drunk living water at God’s well and looked to the cross no longer need to look to themselves. It’s a tough business, always having to make sure that I get my money’s worth, that I look good. When I have discovered God as El Roi, I can do without. That is the life-changing power of the Gospel. He who has prestige no longer has to look after himself! With God’s reputation, you can humble yourself and ask for forgiveness, even if you think the other person is at least as much to blame as you are. You can go back to the job to which you once said: «Never again!«You can connect with people you have cut or despised for years. Maybe you can even get back on track with your former spouse.
At this meeting with El Roi, Hagar receives a promise: «I will give you more descendants than you can count. You will have a son. Name him Ishmael» (v.10f NL). Ishmael later married an Egyptian woman. Because he is also Abraham’s son, a nation is also descended from him. The angel prophesied to Hagar: «Your son will be untamed like a wild donkey! He will stand against all and all will be against him. Yes, he will live in strife with all his brothers»(V.12 NL). Perhaps the hottest topic in Europe at the moment is Islam. I do not want to trivialise Islam, nor do I want to play down real dangers. But if it is true that Islam goes back to Ishmael and Abraham, the lowest root of Islam is fear of rejection. Abraham behaved passively and badly towards his first son and sent him into the desert (Genesis 21:10ff). There is so much mentality in Islamic countries that they think the West wants to finish them off. It is paradoxical that we in the West are afraid of them and they are afraid of us. The only thing that reaches, heals and changes people is love and acceptance. Islam does not know a Father-God. The basic confession of Islam is that Allah is the only one and that he does not beget and was not begotten. The confession of Jesus is: There is a Father. He gives us prestige, unconditional love, and boundless grace. That – and only that – heals and changes a person so that he can be expected to go back and humble himself. The more people do this, the more this «epidemic» spreads. From one act, others will follow, and then another. It can become a positive chain reaction and thus change not only you, but the world.
Possible questions for the small groups
Reading the Bible text: Genesis 16+21
- What do you think of the behaviour of Abram and Sarai? What do you think about Hagar?
- What is your comment on the thoughts about Islam?
- Have you ever left people, situations or places with the firm decision never to return?
- What prevents you from returning?
- Perhaps you first need a desert experience with the God who gives prestige. How will you provoke such an experience?
