Becoming more native by carrying stones
God always puts burdens and difficulties on us. It is important that we do not simply eradicate burdens or difficulties, and even less so if it costs us something. If we live with them and accept them, burdens and difficulties can become a source of richness, depth, growth and fulfilment – even happiness.
A legend from the Sahara tells that an envious man saw a particularly beautiful young palm tree growing in an oasis. As he was filled with envy of all the young, hopeful ones, he wanted to spoil the beautiful palm tree. He took a heavy stone and placed it in the middle of the young crown. The young tree shook itself, but it did not succeed in throwing the stone away. Then it decided to live with the burden. It dug its roots deeper into the earth so that the branches became strong enough to carry the heavy stone.
After years, the man came back to enjoy the crippled tree. But he looked for it in vain. The palm tree, by now grown to be the biggest and strongest in the whole oasis, said to the man: «I have to thank you, your burden has made me strong!»
I read in James 1 verses 2–4: «Dear brothers, when your faith is tested in difficult situations, rejoice. For when you prove yourselves in it, your patience grows. And through patience you will persevere to the end, for then your faith will reach full maturity and be perfect and you will lack nothing.» (NL).
James writes that we should rejoice when our faith is tested in difficult situations. Hand on heart, why should I rejoice in times of difficult situations? Should I rejoice when I lose my job? Should I rejoice when my family breaks up? Should I rejoice when I am suddenly struck down by an illness and, humanly speaking, there is no prospect of recovery? To rejoice in such situations can only be done by a person who is already mentally bent, but surely not by a normal person. And yet there is a fundamental wisdom in life, not only in the world, which says: A person only becomes fit for life when he has learned that he has to fight his way through difficulties. A person who has «roasted pigeons flying in his mouth» from his youth will probably never get anywhere. This wisdom has also proven true time and again in the spiritual realm. Martin Luther once said, «The worst challenge is no challenge at all.» Why? He meant: otherwise we become lukewarm and sluggish in faith, in prayer, in the study of the Word of God. Above all, the arch enemy of faith grows up in our hearts, the natural pride of man, who believes that I can do everything, that I can go further, look what I have achieved.
This makes it clearer to us why it is not good for my ability to live, but above all for my faith, if everything always goes smoothly. But even then the question remains: If that is the case, then it is probably best for a Christian life if things are sometimes a little easier, sometimes a little harder, a healthy middle measure of stress, so to speak. But to rejoice when I am challenged? To welcome adversity like a good friend who helps me along? How can that be done?
First of all, it is very important that we know that we have to decide again and again: «I want to look to Jesus and I expect my help from Him». The path to this decision is often the most difficult. All too quickly, fear, distress, helplessness, anger, unease and helplessness spread through the suffering soul. As a result, it is often difficult at this time to change the track on which Jesus is standing with open arms. The apostle Paul also experienced this. He writes to the Romans in verse 24 of chapter 7: «What a wretched person I am! Who will free me from this life dominated by sin (or difficult situations)». Paul is at the end, he sees no further in his life. But suddenly he looks further, looks at Jesus and says: Yes I do, it has happened, through Jesus Christ, our Lord. He has set me free and helps me even in times of need or difficult situations.
What is resilience?
Psychologists have given a name to this ability to withstand crises and overcome setbacks, and even to grow from them: «resilience». This is what we want to deal with today
I first had a look at Wikipedia, which says: «Resilience is the ability to master crises by drawing on personal and socially mediated resources and to use them as an opportunity for development. An illustrative example of resilience is the ability of a man standing on his feet to pick himself up again from any situation». This does not mean that one simply takes everything lightly and does things as if nothing were wrong. In the course of their lives, people get into situations where they don’t know what to do, where they are desperate, where they just don’t like it any more. Then you feel as if someone had put on the handbrake and you actually want to drive off, but the car doesn’t budge. Then it can mean that we really have to get down. Repressing suffering and pain has nothing to do with this resilience. The question, however, is how we deal with it so that it doesn’t break us. That’s why in psychology resilience is described as a person’s strength to activate inner protective factors in order to get through life crises without lasting impairments and to thrive despite adverse circumstances. It is a kind of resilience, the art of dealing constructively with setbacks – and the special thing about it is that in the end we didn’t just get back up again, but were even able to grow and mature from such a situation. As the Africa missionary Walter Trobisch also said: «Difficulties must not simply be eradicated, not even and all the more so if it costs you something. If we live with them and accept them, difficulties can become a source of richness, depth, growth and fulfilment – yes, even happiness».
Eight years ago, Madlen and I also got into a very difficult situation. Madlen felt that something was wrong with her body. She went to her doctor for a check-up. After the first visit to the doctor, it was already clear that it was serious. After further examinations, the diagnosis was clear: cancer. At that moment, a thousand thoughts went through our heads and it was not easy for either of us. But one thing was clear to us: we wanted to get through this situation with Jesus. We immediately informed the GL of the seetal chile so that the congregation could stand behind us in prayer. A short time later Madlen had to go into hospital. I brought my wife to Aarau in the morning. We agreed that we would talk on the phone again in the evening. I was on duty that day until 9 pm. When I got home, I called Madlen immediately, but I could already hear in her voice that something was wrong. The cancer had progressed so far that it would be difficult to remove everything. This was bad news for us. We could hardly talk, we just cried.…. I prayed with Madlen and hoped that we would be able to cope with this situation. But – and now I’m only talking about me – alone at home – from one second to the next the ground was pulled out from under my feet. I reproached God, I really struggled with God. Fear of loss, doubt, abandonment and frustration spread inside me. It was a very, very difficult situation for Madlen and me. The next morning, my family, the church and I prayed for the success of the operation. I could hardly concentrate, but I was enormously grateful that those around me and the brothers and sisters in the faith were praying more clearly for us. In the afternoon, I was informed by the doctor that the operation had gone well so far and that I could visit Madlen in the evening. I then drove to Aarau together with Tabea, and I remember very clearly how I said to Tabea: I wish that I would have to repent in dust and ashes tonight because of my miserable behaviour towards God. And really – God answered prayers. The operation had gone much better than the doctors had assumed. Tears of gratitude now had room. For me, it was now time to talk to God and say thank you and apologise for my behaviour. The stone that God placed on us was very crushing at the beginning and unfortunately could not be shaken off. So we decided to put our trust completely in Jesus and to expect everything from Him. Through all the ups and downs, our roots have become stronger and our faith firmer.
Where can I get resilience?
You can’t buy them in the Migros! But we can still get them.
a) We can/should practise this.
It’s like sport. Almost anyone can run 100 metres, but to do it in a reasonable time requires training.
It is very helpful if we also seek strength in faith. Various studies have been done on people in difficult situations, e.g. after 9⁄11 in New York. Something stood out: People who are rooted in the Christian faith, who are convinced that God means well with them, were able to pick themselves up again faster and better, i.e. they are more resilient. That’s why it’s very valuable to regularly exercise one’s faith. The current Passion season can be a good opportunity to do this. Take 1% of your daily time to read the Bible and praise God in prayer or song. 1% is 15 minutes a day, you can’t invest 15 minutes better than that! Just as we look after our bodies and exercise or take care of ourselves, our faith needs regular care so that we can grow. Of course, this doesn’t happen overnight and it also depends very much on what kind of personality type you are.
b) Implementing in bad times
There are people who are naturally resilient and get back up quickly when fate strikes. Others fall into a hole just thinking about what could happen. But they too can strive for resilience, because that is something you can learn and practise. Personally, my faith in Jesus Christ is a great help. He has often given me energy in difficult times. It is good to know that Jesus overcame death on Easter. He is stronger than anything that could knock you down. That’s why the promise gives me great strength that we can come to him at any time and he will then give us new life energy again. What can help us: Reading a Psalm or any other Bible text that lifts us up. The great classic is the 23rd Psalm: «The Lord is my shepherd». How wonderful it is that God knows about my situation and does not abandon me, but stands by my side comforting or strengthening me. There is also the 91st Psalm, which describes in many images what God wants to be for me: an umbrella that is stretched out over me and protects me, a strong fortress that offers me refuge, that does not waver when a storm rages. With God I can experience safety, peace and security. One of the most impressive texts on this subject is Isaiah 40:29–31: «He gives new strength to the weary, he gives abundant strength to the powerless. It may be that even young people become dull and weary and young men collapse completely, but those who wait on the Lord gain new strength. They soar upwards like eagles. They run fast without tiring. They will walk and not grow weary» (NL).
This passage is bursting with power! It does not say that we will never experience exhaustion or weakness. Yes, even boys are supposed to get dull and tired – that’s normal. But this should not make us despair. We have a choice in such a situation: either we let ourselves be dragged down or we do what is recommended here: Put our hope in God, look to him, or as it literally says here: wait for him, do not let go of him. Then we have various promises that apply to all of us when we come to him: He gives us new strength, strength in abundance (so it says here!), so that we fly upwards like an eagle, the king of the air. We can run without getting tired or weary. That is tremendous. The prerequisite is that we do not look at our problems, but at God. Peter also experienced this, when he looked at the waves, he sank – as soon as he looked at Jesus and let him hold him, he got strength again. Jesus also wants to give YOU this strength, he pulls YOU out. Or as I read it, «God does not take away the burden, but He strengthens the shoulders.» I wish you from the bottom of my heart that you may experience this. It’s good to know that we don’t always succeed equally well.
When we read the Bible, we meet people who went through difficult times and yet did not let their heads hang down, who experienced God’s closeness and strength precisely in this and can be an example to us. They looked at faith as a sporting competition and got the necessary energy in view of Jesus. I have been able to learn a lot from them. This is what the writer of the Letter to the Hebrews tells us when he writes about the examples of faith: Hebrews 12:1–3: «Since we are surrounded by so many witnesses who have lived a life by faith, let us lay aside every burden that hinders us, especially the sin in which we so easily become entangled. Let us persevere in the race to the end for which we are destined. We do this by keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus, on whom our faith depends from beginning to end. He was willing to die the death of shame on the cross because he knew the joy that awaited him afterwards. Now he sits at the right side of God’s throne in heaven! Remember all that he endured at the hands of those who opposed him, so that you may not grow weary and give up.» (NL).
Especially in this time of Passion, when we think of Jesus» suffering and death, he is an example to me of how he dealt with it. He took it upon himself out of love for us and then also overcame death. That is why I come to him again and again and experience how he gives me strength and serenity in certain situations. That’s why I’ll conclude by sharing with you his encouraging words from Matthew 11:28, which also apply to each of you: «Come to me, all you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest». Or in other words, WELCOME HOME. I wish you not to see your stones primarily as a burden, but as an opportunity.
Possible questions for the small groups
Read the Bible text: James 1, 2–4
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Exchange your «stones» with each other and pray for each other.
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How can I personally practice resilience? Tell each other.
