The God who sees me
Series: Holy – Holy – Holy | Bible text: Genesis 16:13
It is part of God’s identity and nature that he is a God who sees us. There is truth and freedom in his gaze. He sees you and your life completely differently from how other people see you. We can hold on to this fact. Every day anew we may detach ourselves from the human gaze and place ourselves completely under the gaze of God.
When my husband and I do sport, we take great care to wear our sports watches and switch them on and off at the right moment. The sports watch helps to make progress visible, it helps to train in a targeted way and also gives an overview of areas that need to be improved. Now my husband and I are really not ambitious athletes. Nevertheless, we wear the watch for a very important reason. At the end of the workout, you can take a picture of your performance and share it with someone. Because, I don’t know if it’s common knowledge, but without such a proof, the sport doesn’t count! It only counts when I can show it to someone. If you forget the watch, the sport was for nothing.
The God who sees me
In general, an experience is worth much more if we can share it on Instagram or at least in the family chat. I think that’s a trait we see especially in children, but also as we get older, we don’t lose. We want to be seen. It is our desire to be actively noticed. For this reason, I can well imagine that the current year’s motto triggers something in many. It is found in Genesis 13 and reads: «You are a God who sees me!». I think it is sometimes a pity when verses are taken out of context for a better sound and drastically shortened, as in this case. The beginning and the end of the verse were simply left out of the year’s reading. On the one hand not so bad, because the verse part actually contains a main statement of the chapter and teaches us something about the character of God. But believe me, this statement takes on so much more weight when we consider it in its context! Abraham is called by God, out of him is to come God’s chosen, set apart, holy people. Now, in order for Abraham to become a people, the very first step is to have a descendant. Abraham and his wife Sarah, however, do not have children. Both are already relatively old. When Abraham is in his mid-80s, his wife Sarah suggests that he father a child with her maid. This was a very normal and legitimate thing to do at that time. We see the same thing again a few chapters later with Jacob. Some of his children are not by Rachel and Leah, his wives, but by their maidservants. This does not seem to be an obstacle even for God, for these four sons become tribal fathers of one each of the 12 tribes of Israel, just as their brothers did. Furthermore, although Abraham was promised several times that a great nation would arise from him, it was not explicitly promised that this would happen with Sarah. To be honest, I understand their behaviour in view of the fact that they have already been waiting for the fulfilment of the promise for 15 years. Sarah suggested it and Abraham listens to his wife. He sleeps with Hagar, the Egyptian slave girl, and she gets pregnant right away. As you notice, Hagar has nothing to say about it. Finally, as a young, strange, enslaved woman, she is now also raped by an old man. What is particularly horrible about this is surely that this happens not only in spite of her faith but, according to Abraham and Sarah, precisely because of her faith in God and his promises. How terrible must Hagar have felt at that moment? It then seems all the more human and normal to us that Hagar, when she notices the pregnancy, starts to get even with Sarah. She began to look down on Sarah and to look down on her. This went to the point that Sarah asked Abraham for permission to do what she wanted with Hagar. Sarah began to oppress Hagar and Hagar fled into the desert. She was on her way back to her homeland in Egypt. Put yourselves in Hagar’s shoes for a moment. She is sold as a slave from her homeland. She is then raped by her masters «in the name of God». For the first time she experiences through the child inside her that she has value. But then she is made to see again with all clarity that she is nothing more than a slave. She is of no importance as a person! Pregnant, she sets out alone on a long and dangerous journey, hoping that things will be better for her in her homeland. Her prospects were not very good and this shows how hard it must have been for her with Abraham and Sarah. At this low point in life she has an encounter with God. «And the angel of the LORD found her by a fountain of water in the wilderness, by the fountain on the way to Shur. And he said, Hagar, Sarai’s handmaid, whence comest thou, and whither goest thou? And she said, Before Sarai my mistress I am fled. And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Return unto thy mistress, and humble thyself under her hands. And the angel of the LORD said unto her: I will multiply thy seed so much that they shall not be numbered for multitude. And the angel of the LORD said ⟨more⟩ And he said unto her, Behold, thou art with child, and shalt bring forth a son, and shalt call his name Ishmael: for the LORD hath hearkened unto thy affliction. And he, he shall be a man ⟨like⟩ be a wild ass; his hand against all, and the hand of all against him, and all his brethren he sets before his face.» (Genesis 16:7–12 ELB). Hagar’s thoughts were probably just on the hurts from the past and in the future, on what would await her in her old home. The first thing the angel of the Lord does when he meets her is to catch exactly this and bring her into the present. She doesn’t really answer the questions, but says very briefly what exactly is going on with her now. After that comes an invitation and a promise. Hagar is to return to this unbelievably terrible situation from which she has fled. The promise that follows starts well. She shall have many descendants. However, a big but follows, for her son will be rebellious and will rebel against everything and everyone. All in all, that’s two bad news and one good news. It was probably not what Hagar wanted to hear in this situation. At least one would think so. However, the opposite is true. Hagar rejoiced and rejoiced. «Then she called the name of the LORD, which spake unto her, Thou art a God that seeth me. For she said, Have I not also here looked behind him that looked upon me?» (Genesis 16:13 ELB). So «You are a God who sees me» is actually not a saying exactly, but a name of God, El Roi. It is not just a character trait, but a name of God. It is the identity of God, that he is a God who sees me. I said at the beginning that it is a deep need of ours to be seen and perceived. It is precisely this need that God meets. I am making a thesis. When we are in situations of suffering, when it seems hopeless and so incredibly difficult to have hope, it is not the fact that God does not intervene that is really most painful, but our conclusion that God does not care. When we experience injustice, perhaps especially from people in the community, and God does nothing about it, it is so easy to think that God is not interested in me. In this situation, meeting God as El Roi, the God who sees me, is so healing for our soul.
God sees something different from the others
What God sees when he looks at us is different from what people around us see. Let us look again at Hagar. What people see is a slave girl who has no rights. She does not belong to God’s chosen people. And last but not least, she is a woman. From a human point of view, she belongs to the lowest class of people and her value is only minimally higher than that of an animal. What God sees, however, is something quite different! For one thing, the very fact that Hagar was not only directly addressed by God, but was apparently allowed to look after him as he walked away without dying, is proof of the enormous value God sees in her. Instead of always talking about the maid like Abraham and Sarah, God addressed her by name. Furthermore, she was allowed to attribute a name to God. That was not how it normally worked. But God seemed to approve. The holy God meets her at eye level. I think our theme for the year has the potential to challenge us, because we have come to know God as a holy God who is not just a nice buddy and a good friend. But I believe that if we do not begin to understand and acknowledge the holiness of God, we cannot understand how incredibly deep and powerful it is that this God meets us at eye level. Further, God promised Hagar that although she would have to return to her predicament, at least in his eyes she would no longer do so as a slave. With the promise of many descendants, God has appointed her matriarch, the head of a nation. This is not a position that a woman could occupy, from a human point of view. But in God’s eyes it is. What I find particularly exciting then is verse 12: «And he, he becomes a human being ⟨like⟩ be a wild ass; his hand against all, and the hand of all against him, and to all his brethren he sets before his face.» (Genesis 16:12 ELB). From a human perspective, Hagar is promised a stubborn, rebellious son and offspring. But the verse can also be understood differently. A wild ass is an untamable animal. It could not be captured and used as a transport animal like other donkeys. To the ears of a slave, a captive, this probably sounds much more like freedom than burden. Humanly speaking, Hagar must return to her position as a slave. From a divine perspective, however, she is promised freedom. That is the gospel! It is a foretaste of what happened through Jesus centuries later. God saw the suffering of the people and through Jesus he provided a way out of slavery into freedom.
Placing oneself under the gaze of God
That God sees you is a fact. You can believe it or not. Of course, sometimes it is easier to believe it than other times. But ultimately it is a biblical truth and therefore not dependent on your actions. Nevertheless, there is one thing we can do. We can actively place ourselves under the gaze of God. We are incredibly good at exposing ourselves to the gaze of people. I don’t just mean the people around us, but also our own human gaze. In terms of our performance and reputation, we often care so much about what others see and whether I myself am happy with who I am and what I do. The applause of others is much more important than the view from God. In the last few weeks, Matthias has told us again and again about this silence in the morning, and I think this silence has a lot to do with consciously placing ourselves under the gaze of God. What God sees in us is truth and brings us into freedom. It sets us free from the gaze of others and also from the sceptical gaze we have on ourselves. A story from the New Testament that helps me in the morning, when my thoughts want to wander off to everything I still have to and can do, is the story of Martha and Mary. They are two sisters and Jesus is visiting them with his disciples. Martha does exactly what is expected of her from a human perspective. She is a good hostess and gives everything so that her guests want for nothing. Mary doesn’t care what her sister and everyone else thinks about her or what is expected of her. She sits down at the feet of Jesus. She places herself solely under his gaze and Jesus says to her: «But Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha! You are anxious and troubled about many things; but one thing is necessary. But Mary hath chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her..» (Luke 10:41–42 ELB). What Jesus is actually saying is that Martha gave herself to exactly what everyone else saw in her, but Mary freed herself from that and submitted herself to His gaze alone. That is the good!
Possible questions for the small group
Reading the Bible text: Genesis 16
- What feelings does the name of God El Roi, a God who sees me, trigger in you? Only joy or also doubts whether this really applies to you personally or even discomfort, because that means that God also sees your dark sides?
- Which human eyes and which looks from others or yourself determine your actions and your being?
- What makes it so hard to break away from these looks?
- What are strategies or thoughts that could help you to consciously place yourself completely under God’s gaze?
- Is there a current situation in your life where you feel unseen by God? Pray together that you may experience God’s loving gaze on you in this very situation.
